Male, white, born in the eighties from a middle class family in a G7 country.
I do art.
Moreover, I am a stranger. I don’t live any more in the country where I grew up, I fled it because I felt like a stranger there, I wasn’t home. So I had to assume to be a stranger, at least in the new country my oddness was understood. I had an excuse, that kind of excuse that autochthonous give you because of their largesse, because you are shy, because you are tamed.
At the beginning it was clear: my dictionary was poor, my accent strong. After some time I got confident speaking, that’s when troubles start again. Either people not dare to ask, either they are amazed by this foreigner that learnt their precious and difficult language that well. It pisses me off.
What is the first adjective people apply to you? Is it a matter of height, weight, colour of the hair, colour of the eye? Is it the colour of your skin? Is the country you come from? Is it funny, sexy, smiling?
Most part of the people that tells you that you are free are funny, sexy, smiling. They can be. I could as well because I am part of the most privileged population of the world.
Still, I am a stranger.
If you are not a stranger it is quite hard to understand how does it feel like. I am not talking about tourism, be a tourist is a completely different situation. It is temporary and deliberate. Being a stranger is permanent. A stranger is a displaced person, it can be an enigma, it is an incognito. Same people see strangers as a threat.
I am proud of being a threat. I don’t like safeness, I don’t like comfort. This is not about risk and heroism, this is not about having a wild and adventurous life. This is about not feeling home anywhere, this is about permanent instability.
It is about difference.
It is about a situation that allows you to accept loss. It is a situation when you accept the fact that there are many things that you wont be able to understand, and many others that you wont be able to control.
This is about complexity.
To bother is why I do art. To expose oddness is why I do art. To recall diversity is why I do art. Sometimes it takes me to care about beauty, sometimes it takes me to exhibit sorrow.